"The List"--My top things I wanted in a Husband"

(Me in 2006!)

So, I must share my top things that I wanted in a husband. I wrote this in about 2006 and I'm amazed after looking back at it because my husband came ready-made at about 90% of this list!

Before you read my list..There is NOTHING wrong with your 50 "standards"--but you better make sure that you're all those things on your little list. Don’t put a ton of pressure on a guy to be something that you aren’t . Granted, the man is supposed to be a leader, and that’s a given but my husband wasn’t EVERYTHING on my list. He grew and developed into an amazing man and now.. my dream guy. He’s still working on some stuff and I’m thankful for grace. The same grace he gives me as I need to work on things as well! Development MEANS some fights, tears, arguments, and alot of "meeting in the middle"--so don't think that the process is easy. If it was EASY, the divorce rate would be at 0%.  So if your guy or girl has the basics—stop being them down every two minutes because they haven’t changed 100%. You aren’t perfect either—as much as we’d like to think we were.  Even WITH your list, our focus should always be on Christ--not a checkbox. As long as my future husband had some of the important things & NO dealbreakers, to me--he was worth starting a relationship with. So listen to the Holy Spirit as He LEADS & guides you. Someone may have EVERYTHING you want on your list but you have zero peace about them. So--they're disqualified. God knows your end from your beginning. Trust Him.

My List… J of wants in a Husband-2006

1. He must love the Lord thy God with all of his heart mind soul and strength and love his neighbor as himself.
2. He MUST be a gentlemen open doors, hold my hand as I walk up and down stairs, help me put my coat on, pull out my chair, All that and then some…)
3. He must be a hearer and a doer of the Word of God, PERIOD. No fakin’ and makin’.
4. Must be intelligent
5. He must have a servant’s heart
6. He must understand the needs of me as a woman and the purpose for our relationship
7. He must have a JOB
8. Financially secure- How am I gone eat?!? Investments? Goals?! Plans?! Actions.. I need to see some FRUIT before the RING!
9. I desire not to be kissed until my wedding day. (crazy, but so true) **I love how this happen. We kissed on our wedding day 8/14/2010!** Go Jesus!
10. Must be a giver to God’s Kingdom.
11. Must be attractive and keep himself together, clothes, haircut, work out, a very neat person in appearance
12. Cannot have a temper
13. Must love to read
14. Someone who is secure
15. Must pray in tongues, and have prayer/bible study/ devotion every morning
16. Must keep me before the Lord, He’s the Christ in the Spirit and I’m the church, must walk side by side.
17.  Must NOT try to have sex w/ me prior to marriage- I must be precious to HIM
18.  I must be able to be myself, weakness and all
19. Must listen to me!
20. Must have a pure heart
21. NO foul language
22. Be positive in his thinking!
23. NEAT!!!
24. Must be an encourager
25. Cooking is always a bonus J
26. Affection!!!! Touching is my love language!
27. Must SPOIL me and put me first (after Jesus)

I always say this...before you get into a relationship--make sure that your foundation is Christ. If you keep jumping from relationship to relationship it's like spraying perfume but refusing to take a shower. All of that hurt from past relationships is going to seep into the next one. GOD wants your HEART. So while you're making this list.. make one to Christ.. of everything you want to be for HIM.

I just taught on Overcoming Hurt on 1/17/2012 you can catch it ----> here

God loves you like crazy,


Heather Lindsey